


Lost in the woods

by Shadowdianne



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: Angst, F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-15
Updated: 2015-05-15
Packaged: 2018-03-30 16:55:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,666
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3944404
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Shadowdianne/pseuds/Shadowdianne
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Following the season finale Emma finds herself in the woods, fighting against a power that she doesn't know if she can control...</p>
            </blockquote>





	Lost in the woods

**Author's Note:**

  * For [GardensOfTheMoon](https://archiveofourown.org/users/GardensOfTheMoon/gifts).



Being the dark one is lonely, that’s what Emma has discovered. It’s not painful, it’s just a never ending feeling of loneliness that threaten to absorb every human thought of you until what it’s left inside your heart is only the most animalistic version of you, one that won’t feel lonely, or bad, for the decisions you would need to do, that you are going to force everyone to do.

The dark magic is alluring yet strange, it’s not something that she had ever experienced and so, after her reappearance somewhere in the middle of the forest she had been trying to hide herself, being as further as possible from Storybrooke without actually crossing the city line. She knows that she should do that, cross the line, being stripped away from her powers but… she can’t, she is too selfish.

Too selfish because she knows that once she crosses the city line she will be alone, forever.

It’s cruel really, how fate had seemed to try once and again to teach her that she has a family, people who love her just to strip her off them.

She looks at her hands, wounded, covered in cuts and dried blood because in her first hours, when everything had hurt and she  had tried to get away from the all-consuming feeling of loneliness she had scratched them until she couldn’t take the pain anymore. She can feel everything, every spec of magic, every power that Storybrooke has. For a second, in the middle of the night, she had even felt Regina’s magic, the purple scent of the former queen almost guiding her back to the civilization, leading her out of the woods.

But she had resisted, Regina… no one can see her like this, not for now. She had felt the dagger calling her most basic levels of consciousness but so far she had fought against its power, knowing that is just a matter of time; she can’t fight against the power that is now lurking inside her body, waiting… whispering in her ear how she is now truly and completely alone. Alone until someone kills her.

The idea of death is looking more and more appealing as the time passes. But she knows that she should wait, she made a promise to her parents, she knows they will try to find a way to save her, she only needs to be strong for a little more, a few hours more. But, she thinks as she bits her by now broken lips, scabs and dried blood framing her mouth, maybe it’s too late when they finally found something for her, maybe she is already beyond salvation. She knows she needs to be strong but she had been strong for so many people… The savior who cannot be saved she thinks, smiling a humorless smile that breaks the scabs and make her wince in pain.

She stil can have everything, the magic whispers, a family, a happy ending, she only needs to listen, to do what it says and she will never be alone, they will love her… and fear her. What’s better than love and respect? The magic is persistent, sleazy, soft, and for a second she considers to do what it is saying to her. Maybe it will stop hurting; maybe she will finally be free, free of prophecies, free to be herself.

She shakes her head and tries to keep walking just like she had been doing for the past hours, walk, keep moving around the woods, keep having the magic inside of her, keep fighting the burning sensation, the need to cry, to rip her lungs and her heart.

Her heart, that’s beating fast, its white magic being quickly defeated by the ancient power of the dagger. What will be quicker? Her death or the victory of the dark magic? Will she still be Emma beyond the layers that the Dark One uses?

She stumbles over a rock and falls, her whole body shaking once again, she can feel the magic slowly choking her while promising her a long life, a life full of her loved ones, a life in which she would never need to settle for less, a life with Henry, with her parents with… Regina.

Regina… she licks her lips and crawls until her whole body rests on an old and probably half rotten log. The earth behind her body is cold, humid, the air is filled with the odor of leaves fermenting on the pools of water and mud that cover almost all the surface of the woods, she hears the wind, whooshing between the trees, the darkness slowly approaching her part of the forest.

She needs to be strong, she knows Regina will come for her and she trusts her, more than she trusts her parents or Hook right now, she knows, because she had known for the longest of times that she can believe in her.

Two tears roll down her face, opening paths in her now dirty skin as she tries to not cry when another stab on her heart leaves her practically unconscious. The magic is feral now, not sweet, not promising, it needs a body, her body and it needs it as quickly as possible.

“I never told her” She thinks, her mind starting to drift away, her eyes, along with the rest of her body, burning on their sockets. But Regina is smart, she is way too smart, she probably knows by now. Does she? The feverish thought invades the part of her mind that is still hers and hers alone. She knows? She realized at some point? She knew even before Emma knew it?

Probably not, she finally thinks, she is with Robin, her soulmate.

“That can change very quickly” The magic whispers again, showing her images of Regina laughing, smiling, talking to her, just like they had been doing while Robin was away. Regina had been next to her, she can have all of that again once she succumbs to the dark magic. It’s only a tiny decision, the magic whispers, the easiest one. No more pain, only Regina and she…. And the dagger of course.

She groans and shakes her head once again, the magic won’t have her, she only needs to wait for a little more. She had felt the dagger being moved away but they haven’t summoned her, they haven’t say her name so she still needs to wait, just for a little more, just for a few hours.

And then what, the magic replies, are you sure you are not being abandoned like the first time? You aren’t the savior anymore, you are useless to them. Them, who changed the fate of a child only to have you as the perfect princess they needed to have, them, who lied to you over and over again. What is stopping them to make them abandon you?

No, she replies, her hands now two fists over her lap, trying to keep at least an ounce of body heat within her, her nails are breaking her skin; the pain is the only thing that it’s now keeping her sane against the burn she feels inside her chest. They love me, the will save me, Regina knows, she will probably be the one who finds a solution, I will be saved and you will be destroyed. They will find Merlin.

The magic laughs; You are too naïve Emma, it whispers, you can’t be saved, you were always my goal, to have you, to possess you and now, because your love for Regina you are going to be mine as long as you live. And you will, girl, you will live until all your loved ones have long passed away. With only me as your only companion. Surrender now and everything will be less painful; I will even let you have your happy ending if you cooperate.

“No” Emma screams, her breathing becoming labored, her throat burning as she tries to not cry once again, she can’t show any weakness, the dark magic would sense it and she need to be strong, strong for her parents, for Henry, for Regina. She needs to be there when they finally find a solution; she needs to be. She needs to see them, talk to them, hug them; she needs to listen to Regina’s voice one more time.

It’s stupid really, she thinks as she tries to stand up and keep walking once again, her legs trembling for a second as she finally rises. It’s stupid how many times she thought she could have told her how much she mattered for her, she almost told her the truth back in Neverland, and again in the city line, she almost told Regina how much she cared about her once they returned to Storybrooke and again when the brunette finally admitted that she didn’t want to kill her. She had wanted to say it so many times that she had been scared, completely terrified that Regina would turn her back at her and leave her. And she needs Regina; she needs the stubborn, strong woman in her life. Beyond everything.

Henry, that’s another stubborn one, she thinks as she starts walking, leaving the main roads between the woods at her back as she moves, not wanting to be spotted by anyone. If Regina is one of the most intelligent people she knows Henry is the most logical and yet most amazing one, he is strong, he will also find a solution, she only needs to wait.

But the magic is already too strong, she needs to rest for a second, just for a second and her pain will be gone after that. She can feels the magic smiling, ready to take over her body and maybe she is naïve, or weak because what can she do? What can she do against a power that has been free for over, at least, 4oo years?

The answer, the magic says, is nothing.


End file.
